Picnic in the Park
by Fallen Ark Angel
Summary: There's nothing like an afternoon spent with family. Other than, like, sleeping instead of that. Because then sleeping is definitely better. Definitely. - One-shot, set in Parenthood universe.


Picnic in the Park

At all of nine months, Ivory Dreyar had already learned the hardest and most difficult truth to accept; life was hard.

Extremely hard. If she didn't have people in her face, making incomprehensible noises, then she was feeling terribly lonely and wanted just those noises, but to no avail. And then there was the insatiability of her tummy. It was never full!

And oh, the horrible things they tried to feed her. It was almost inhuman. You can't go from drinking nothing, but milk for the entirety of your (few months of) life and then just be switched to mushy vegetables.

You just can't!

Then, of course, were those dang things that were growing out of her gums making her cry sometimes, just from the agony of it all. Add in the horrors of diaper rash, the way that her head felt cold without her little snuggly hat, but also far too warm with it on, as well as the way that she could not figure out how to tell the big, horrible doggy that she did not like his kisses (slobber) all over her and, well, you were left with a very unhappy baby.

Much as she was at the moment. There she was, lying flat on her back, bottle dangling from one hand as she lazily watched her big brother wrestle their cousin into submission.

Or at least try to.

"Stay down, Mace," Nathan growled as he held his brown haired cousin to the ground though the wiggly boy just wouldn't listen. "I mean it!"

"No," he yelled just as loudly back. "Men don't give up!"

"You tell him, Mace," Ivory heard her uncle yell far too loudly to be so close to her precious baby ears. "Men never give up!"

They were at park as it happened, that day, having what they were all hoping would be a peaceful family picnic. So far, it'd gone pretty well. That might have more to do with the fact the thing had just started and not everyone was there yet, but whatever.

"Would you shut up?" Laxus growled as he walked passed Ivory's line of sight. She just stayed there on the blanket they'd laid out though, not up for rolling over and crawling off that day. Nah. Her bottle was well worth laying there and finishing. Her daddy, Laxus, stopped to glance down at her as he passed, a Frisbee in hand. "Is he disturbing you, Ivory? Huh?"

She rather liked the big lug and tolerated his baby talk as the man grinned down at his youngest. But then the dang dog was barking, annoyed that his precious Frisbee was being held hostage, and damn; Laxus hated that dog almost as much as baby Ivory did.

"You stupid mutt," he growled as he walked off, going to throw the disk. "Can't you see I'm playin' with my baby?"

That got a giggle, of course, from the blanket's other inhabitant, Mirajane, though she only continued to glance over her book she'd brought along, to keep her occupied until everyone showed up. Ivory kicked her feet a bit, which got her a gentle stomach pat as a reward, but she mostly was just focused on watching Nate and Mace.

Errr, rather, staring over in that area. Focus was far too strong a word for such a thing, but whatever.

Her Aunt Evergreen wa the next to show up, carrying along a picnic basket to go along with the things that Mirajane had already brought. The woman was kind enough to stop by where Ivory was contemplating pooping, drinking more of her bottle, and what the hell her brother and cousin were doing, just to speak to her.

Just coo, really. And make all these weird faces that Ivory did not understand, but that was okay. It pretty much matched the rest of her short life.

Then she did poop and Ever was done with her for the day.

It was the true nature of their relationship and, honestly, Ivory couldn't blame her.

After Laxus took her off to get cleaned up, she found that someone else had shown up. Freed. He was pretty alright. Except when he was being creepy.

And he was constantly being creepy.

Kinda like Daddy, but he wasn't Daddy and it was weird when he'd stare so deeply at her and pick her up just to make sure she was still breathing (of all the complexities in life, breathing was one that she'd gotten down right from the get-go). Then he'd make all these bizarre comments about how he was kiinda like her uncle too and that he cared very much for her parents (he'd usually add something about how he cared more for Laxus, but not to worry about that).

But other than that, he was alright. He usually didn't talk to her in that weird high pitch voice the others used, so that was a plus.

That day he seemed far more interested in speaking with her mother on something and only greeted her with a really big grin. Laxus almost immediately laid her back down on the blanket, that time on her tummy.

"There you go." And he then he gave back her bottle. Oh, and the kiss on the head. Can't forget the kiss on the head. "All better."

Well, kinda better. As he walked off to go argue with Elfman over who exactly had the better son (no offense to Mace or anything, but was it really a competition?), Ivory rolled back onto her back and went back to bottle drinking.

Mmmm. Milk.

Eventually her other brother, Pike, and their Gramps showed up, the little boy first going to greet, of course, his doggy, but just as quickly was going to check on his sissy.

"Hi, Ivy," he said as he didn't just lean down. Oh, no, Pike was the kind to literally get down on her level to speak with her. "Did you miss me? I went with Gramps up to the hall for a bit, but I came back. Are you sippin' your bottle? 'cause you can't eat none of the picnic food?"

Meh. At that point her bottle was mostly empty and she was sorta just waiting for it to be refilled. Or for her body to get ready to have a good cry over the whole ordeal. If they waited long enough, maybe even another diaper change.

Boy. Days sure could be eventful.

Pike spent some more time nuzzling and tickling her before he rushed off to go play with the dog or something. Whatever. Ivory was over him by that point.

There were only so much snuggles and love you could take from one person at one time.

Honestly, there were.

Gramps came over after awhile, to hold her for a bit. Ivory allowed this without much resistance, mainly because he went over to the diaper bag and fetched another bottle.

Quite honestly, the man was perfect. Always knew what she wanted. Always.

But man could he talk.

That day included. He walked her all around the park, blabbing on and on about the guildhall and Fairy Tail and how much he loved her and all sorts of other boring stuff that she just did not care about.

However, his walking was pretty soothing. Not to mention his voice. And he smelled nice. Familiar. Not like Mommy, but sorta like Daddy (the old man had, in actuality, been stealing his grandson's cologne, but whatever). And even though they weren't at home and it was a bit warm outside, she was able to drift off in his arms rather easily.

It really wasn't that long before she was woken up once more. She didn't find herself on the blankie or in Gramp's arms, however, but rather her stroller. It was quite comfy, truthfully. And someone had left her bottle in there with her! And her pacifier was right there. And oh, she could even see Mommy, over on theblanket, eating.

She was content. Truly and completely.

Then _they_ showed up.

Late as always, her Aunt Lisanna and Bickslow came to the picnic bearing beers (literally two, one in each of their hands, but whatever; it counted), which pissed off Laxus, who had told them that if they were late to one more family event, they just wouldn't be invited anymore (which was crazy; if they knew that was all it took to be uninvited, they'd have done it a long time ago), and leading to the man banishing them from where they were all eating until he cooled off.

They chose to go stand next to Ivory and examine her.

"I am so glad," her Aunt Lisanna said as, handing her beer off on her boyfriend, she reached out to gently stroke Ivory's head, "that we don't have a baby. Aren't you?"

Ignoring the fact that his babies were diligently circling around, awaiting a command, the ever faithful boyfriend only said, "Absolutely."

"Although," Lisanna said after a moment passed where her and Ivory were having this really deep connection, their matching blue eyes not clashing in the slightest. Putting the baby's pacifier in her mouth for her, the woman said, "She is kinda cute."

See? Lissy always did that. Was always flip-flopping on him. Impossible to figure out.

"Absolutely," the seith agreed, his babies echoing this loudly.

"But then again-"

"You guys can come back now," Laxus was yelling at them then. "And stop bothering my baby!"

Sheesh.

Ivory was very much so enjoying sitting in her stroller and sucking on her pacifier, living life, when, once more, she was disturbed. That time, however, it was by someone she did not want any involvement with. At all.

It was the stupid doggy! He was licking at her face and arg! She hated him! He was so big and smelly and was always getting her all covered in spit and that was her job! Getting herself all dribbled on. Not his.

How dare he try and ruin one of the highlights of her day?

She was just about to start crying when Mace came over, bearing the remainder of his lunch, planning on feeding it to the mutt.

"Leave Ivory alone," he giggled, helping drag the doggy away, much to her relief. "She doesn't like when you give her kisses."

Not at all.

Mace was still busy feeding the dog his scraps when, much to Ivory's amusement, Nate, quite literally came hopping over to her.

"Hi, Egg!" He grinned madly at her and Ivory just kicked her feet and sucked some more on her pacifier. "Are you havin' fun?"

Kinda. Sorta. It was much better then as he leaned down to gently press his forehead against hers, his dark eyes making her giggle. Just what he wanted.

"Me too." Glancing around, Nate noticed that no one was paying attention and quickly moved on to what he really came over for. "Here. I didn't finish this. You want some?"

It was a little plastic cup of yogurt that someone had brought to the picnic and was just perfect for him to run his finger around the edge of and collect the left over yogurt, just for her to lick off.

At least Nate was pretty sure.

Either way, she sure liked sucking it off his finger.

And brought Nate one step closer to being her favorite.

Seriously, how could he not be? He gave her yogurt. His yogurt. Which, fine, he wasn't going to finish and only throw away, but still, he could have finished it. But he didn't. Because he wanted her to have it.

And to bond with him. Over Pike. And stinkin' ol' Laxus.

They were just close that way.

Ivory sure liked the yogurt. And her biggest bubba. He was great. He did that sorta things all the time. Sure, he probably shouldn't, but, really, half the things Nate spent his days doing were things he shouldn't be.

Like jumping off the top bunk in his bedroom. Or not washing his hands (literally ever). Oh and running with scissors? Practically the champ.

Sneaking Egg good things to eat just went along with that.

"Nate," they heard when he was about done letting her finish the remnants of his yogurt. "Are you bothering Ivory?"

Uh, no. He wasn't. He was making Egg's life better.

Still though, getting in trouble at the fun picnic day did not sound so great, so he only rushed right off.

It felt like forever and a day (really, just a day was pretty long to her, so the forever part was being a tad dramatic) before they all finally said goodbye. Gramps, who was going back up to the hall, came and gave her a bunch of kisses while Uncle Elf and Aunt Ever just both grinned down at her (or at least the former did) before saying some of that annoying baby gibberish that just made her kick her feet in annoyance. And, of course, Aunt Lisanna came over with Bickslow to hem haw around about whether or not they were ready for children (they weren't, at all, so that answered that) before taking off to go get wasted and lament about how lame the picnic had been.

Mace, who was going home with his parents, patted her on the head and Freed did the same while Pike and Nate were going home with her, so they spend the end of the picnic arguing over who got to hold the doggy's leash.

It was only resolved when it was decided that Nate would get to push Egg's stroller and Pike got the leash, which was great, until, you know, Ivory had to go and throw that fit halfway back home. Then Mommy was picking her up and snuggling her in her arms while Nate got stuck pushing an empty stroller like a dope.

Ugh.

Mommy calmed her down a bit when they finally got back home, but it was Laxus that fixed her right up when they got there.

Mainly because he finally understood when she'd wanted the whole day; to be put in her crib and left alone for awhile.

"Overstimulating day, huh, Ivory?" Laxus grinned down at her as she settled out in her crib. It was still in his and Mirajane's bedroom, the crib was, but he'd drawn all the blinds and was reaching up then to turn on her cute little mobile, the things spinning around and captivating the sleepy baby. "Daddy knows. I get it. There was so much for you to look at! Flowers and bugs and all your family was there. That's more than enough for you, huh?"

Way more. And the yogurt on top of that? Ugh. Full day. Time for sleep.

Until it was time for her dinner in a few hours. Then she'd be wide awake. If not before. Just to cry. And be cranky. Oh, and more diaper changes.

Other than that though, she was ready to just rest for a bit. And, with a grin, Laxus left her to it.

Relaxing easily while watching that silly spinning mobile, Ivory stuck her tongue out a bit and, really, truly, drifted off for a bit.

Hmmm. Maybe life wasn't always so hard.


End file.
